My Pessah Visit
Ok... while I did not have my sedar with my Dad and his CURRENT wife- aka wife #3.. and I think it's safe to say that she would find both nicknames offensive but *shrug* I don't like her so 8-P , Anyway I saw them on the way to see my mom for Passover and to hang out with her on her b'day( the 3rd), and while I spent more time with my Mom- my Dad and his wife really overshadow the rest of my visit.
If I haven't mentioned it before- My father is judgemental. Very judgemental and has made me aware that a) He thinks I'm evil[ in the 90's when I told him he wasn't dying and would live longer then HIS father ] and b) I'm a disappointment[ and this was hammered into me when I visited right after 9/11 in NYC]. When I saw him on Sunday, he started in RIGHT AWAY tearing into my older brother. Again to keep you up to date- my older brother is NOT married and is expecting a kid with a gal. The girl who's giving birth to his kid is nice, has two daughters already and as a bonus( as far as my mom is concerned) is JEWISH.
When I saw my Dad, he totally started in on the fact that they are NOT married, and what this might or might not mean... Like the fact that if things go wrong my bro might have NO rights to the kid whatsoever, save to pay for the pug... Now I kept my peice because welll... I don't want to get into an arguement with my Dad if I can avoid it, esp. as I don't give a damn what my older brother does or doesn't do with his life. But my father just went ON and ON about all the mistakes my brother was making.
He did however find time to dis me, pointing out that between me and my OLDER brother we make one good kid. Which briefly made me wonder if my younger brother was a 'full boy' as he didn't seem to be a 1/2 like me and my older brother or a third of a man- and me and my older brother need SOMETHING from him, as well as the missing stuff...( I remember I'm resposible which is what my older brother needs- I forgot what he has that I need).
My Dad's current wife is going to have a book come out next year. I'm not going to mention it- as well a) I don't really want to give her free p.r. and b) I don't want any sort of 'track back'. She's trying to increase her 'web presense' and wanted me to help her- I guess because I'm 'more hip' to the interwebs. That's what most of our face time on Sunday was about- her wanting to know WHERE she should be on the webs and how to increase her face, so that people would find her/ her book. I told her that she should have a myspace... as while NONE of my friends( well save Aimee) have myspace- that's where all the hip people seem to be. I also lied and told her that like Evan, I just had a LJ account to comment on a friends LJ... and told her that while I personally perfered LJ- for her, myspace might be the way to go OR she should post on both/ where ever she can( she also has a yahoo 360 blog... though I don't know anyone besides her on yahoo 360). The tip top of this conversation was when she mentioned that she had a amazon link SO if I wanted to buy anything from amazon- I could go to her site and buy through her site and she'd get a kickback from amazon.
Now it should be noted she has FAR more then me- I rent a cruddy 1 bed room apartment in Boston- She/My dad have a HOUSE in Stamford and OWN an apartment in NYC. They travel on a regular basis to REAL places... He has money and she has access to at least 1/2 of it... and she's mentioning how if I buy from amazon via HER website- she'll get MORE. No thanks... maybe if she offered me 1/2 her haul( even if it was '1/2' of less then the whole like Claire's mom...) but she offered me squat so my next amazon order- I'm doing via Tvshowsondvd.com as I like their website and think they've at least have earnt a taste of my money.
Her other behaviour also earned scorn from me. She asked me whether I was looking forward to being an Uncle, as again my older brother is expecting. I told her and my father that I was already an Uncle, as far as I was concerned because of my Step sister on the other side of the family= My mother's Husband's daughter has a son. I then talked abit about my sister's son and how I adore him and think he's fun to hang arround with( he was my favorite part of our going to Lake Tahoe last year). Well, she could NOT have tuned me out faster.
I later asked my Dad, when we were alone, what her major malfuction was? How his wife had ASKED me about being an uncle and then not listened to me when I explained how I enjoyed being an uncle already. He explained to me that she had lost interest in my story because she didn't KNOW the people I was talking about... and went on to explain that she did the same thing to another writer recently as the writer told a story about somebody that my dad's wife didn't know... so wifey tuned the author out. I told this story to a friend who agreed that wifey was exceddingly rude; esp. as said freind was willing to listen to me talk about my nephew- and didn't complain that HE didn't want to hear about any part of my family that he hadn't meet.
He also explained to me that the reason she asked was because she wonders what sort of role she will play in my older brother's kid's life... Which made me roll my eyes. I pointed out to him that my mother is active in my sister's life and with her kid... as far as the kid is concerned- he has 3 sets of grandparents. I say I roll my eyes- because again, while my mom has a grandparent role in the kid's life; that's also because my mom is close to her step daughter.... And I do NOT feel that my father's wife is close to ANY of us, least of all my older brother.
If I haven't mentioned it before- My father is judgemental. Very judgemental and has made me aware that a) He thinks I'm evil[ in the 90's when I told him he wasn't dying and would live longer then HIS father ] and b) I'm a disappointment[ and this was hammered into me when I visited right after 9/11 in NYC]. When I saw him on Sunday, he started in RIGHT AWAY tearing into my older brother. Again to keep you up to date- my older brother is NOT married and is expecting a kid with a gal. The girl who's giving birth to his kid is nice, has two daughters already and as a bonus( as far as my mom is concerned) is JEWISH.
When I saw my Dad, he totally started in on the fact that they are NOT married, and what this might or might not mean... Like the fact that if things go wrong my bro might have NO rights to the kid whatsoever, save to pay for the pug... Now I kept my peice because welll... I don't want to get into an arguement with my Dad if I can avoid it, esp. as I don't give a damn what my older brother does or doesn't do with his life. But my father just went ON and ON about all the mistakes my brother was making.
He did however find time to dis me, pointing out that between me and my OLDER brother we make one good kid. Which briefly made me wonder if my younger brother was a 'full boy' as he didn't seem to be a 1/2 like me and my older brother or a third of a man- and me and my older brother need SOMETHING from him, as well as the missing stuff...( I remember I'm resposible which is what my older brother needs- I forgot what he has that I need).
My Dad's current wife is going to have a book come out next year. I'm not going to mention it- as well a) I don't really want to give her free p.r. and b) I don't want any sort of 'track back'. She's trying to increase her 'web presense' and wanted me to help her- I guess because I'm 'more hip' to the interwebs. That's what most of our face time on Sunday was about- her wanting to know WHERE she should be on the webs and how to increase her face, so that people would find her/ her book. I told her that she should have a myspace... as while NONE of my friends( well save Aimee) have myspace- that's where all the hip people seem to be. I also lied and told her that like Evan, I just had a LJ account to comment on a friends LJ... and told her that while I personally perfered LJ- for her, myspace might be the way to go OR she should post on both/ where ever she can( she also has a yahoo 360 blog... though I don't know anyone besides her on yahoo 360). The tip top of this conversation was when she mentioned that she had a amazon link SO if I wanted to buy anything from amazon- I could go to her site and buy through her site and she'd get a kickback from amazon.
Now it should be noted she has FAR more then me- I rent a cruddy 1 bed room apartment in Boston- She/My dad have a HOUSE in Stamford and OWN an apartment in NYC. They travel on a regular basis to REAL places... He has money and she has access to at least 1/2 of it... and she's mentioning how if I buy from amazon via HER website- she'll get MORE. No thanks... maybe if she offered me 1/2 her haul( even if it was '1/2' of less then the whole like Claire's mom...) but she offered me squat so my next amazon order- I'm doing via Tvshowsondvd.com as I like their website and think they've at least have earnt a taste of my money.
Her other behaviour also earned scorn from me. She asked me whether I was looking forward to being an Uncle, as again my older brother is expecting. I told her and my father that I was already an Uncle, as far as I was concerned because of my Step sister on the other side of the family= My mother's Husband's daughter has a son. I then talked abit about my sister's son and how I adore him and think he's fun to hang arround with( he was my favorite part of our going to Lake Tahoe last year). Well, she could NOT have tuned me out faster.
I later asked my Dad, when we were alone, what her major malfuction was? How his wife had ASKED me about being an uncle and then not listened to me when I explained how I enjoyed being an uncle already. He explained to me that she had lost interest in my story because she didn't KNOW the people I was talking about... and went on to explain that she did the same thing to another writer recently as the writer told a story about somebody that my dad's wife didn't know... so wifey tuned the author out. I told this story to a friend who agreed that wifey was exceddingly rude; esp. as said freind was willing to listen to me talk about my nephew- and didn't complain that HE didn't want to hear about any part of my family that he hadn't meet.
He also explained to me that the reason she asked was because she wonders what sort of role she will play in my older brother's kid's life... Which made me roll my eyes. I pointed out to him that my mother is active in my sister's life and with her kid... as far as the kid is concerned- he has 3 sets of grandparents. I say I roll my eyes- because again, while my mom has a grandparent role in the kid's life; that's also because my mom is close to her step daughter.... And I do NOT feel that my father's wife is close to ANY of us, least of all my older brother.
Labels: Dad, Dad's CURRENT Wife
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