Who benefits... not me...
I started writing before I went to work about what was going on at work- but what it boils down to;
Since my 30th Birthday- I got a Masters in Library Science. Have I benefited from having a masters? NOPE. Not really. I still work a crap retail job and heck two members of my current management team also worked at Brookstone( the store that I worked at when I was 30- though they didn't work with me as they're too young).
Since my 38th birthday- I've been going to the gym on a fairly regular basis... And I'm not even sure if I'm in better PHYSICAL health- as I still have problems sleeping and I know I've been stressing a bit on the fact that I've recently GAINED a few pounds... and worried about what my mom is going to say when I see her for Passover.
I've done all this work to try and improve my live- mentally and physically but it hasn't helped me financially or emotionally. My bank account is still empty and my love life (and ego) is non existent.
Why do I bother?
And that’s why I’m writing this now… as I came home early because I’ve worked myself into a state today… I got my ‘yearly’ raise yesterday and this morning I figured out how pitiful it is.
To put my raise in perspective, I took the amount that my commute went up at the beginning of this year- and divided it by my raise to see how many hours it takes my raise to clear this ONE cost of living increase. It takes 60 HOURS of my raise- almost 2 weeks of work, to clear the extra monthly cost of getting to work.
Why do I bother?
I bought a beer- and am thinking of just zoning out in front of the telly tonight and hope I’m better tomorrow- as I really can’t afford to call in sick… esp. as I don’t want to make a habit out of calling in every month or so… I’d rather use my ‘personal’ days for vacation.
Since my 30th Birthday- I got a Masters in Library Science. Have I benefited from having a masters? NOPE. Not really. I still work a crap retail job and heck two members of my current management team also worked at Brookstone( the store that I worked at when I was 30- though they didn't work with me as they're too young).
Since my 38th birthday- I've been going to the gym on a fairly regular basis... And I'm not even sure if I'm in better PHYSICAL health- as I still have problems sleeping and I know I've been stressing a bit on the fact that I've recently GAINED a few pounds... and worried about what my mom is going to say when I see her for Passover.
I've done all this work to try and improve my live- mentally and physically but it hasn't helped me financially or emotionally. My bank account is still empty and my love life (and ego) is non existent.
Why do I bother?
And that’s why I’m writing this now… as I came home early because I’ve worked myself into a state today… I got my ‘yearly’ raise yesterday and this morning I figured out how pitiful it is.
To put my raise in perspective, I took the amount that my commute went up at the beginning of this year- and divided it by my raise to see how many hours it takes my raise to clear this ONE cost of living increase. It takes 60 HOURS of my raise- almost 2 weeks of work, to clear the extra monthly cost of getting to work.
Why do I bother?
I bought a beer- and am thinking of just zoning out in front of the telly tonight and hope I’m better tomorrow- as I really can’t afford to call in sick… esp. as I don’t want to make a habit out of calling in every month or so… I’d rather use my ‘personal’ days for vacation.
Labels: My impending 40th
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