Full of Nothing
Just wanted to blog before I went off to bed tonight/ this morning that today I often felt filled with crap and empty of good stuff.
Which made me wonder about cause and effect. Was the anger pushing out all the good stuff, or because there was no good stuff the anger was filling the void.
I decided that it was the second because of the lack of good- the anger filled the void. I say this because when I watch say Scrubs, or play a video game, or do something else I LIKE- the anger is displaced by my enjoyment... I forget that I'm angry because I'm NOT ANGRY when I'm doing something I like. Therefor, when I don't have something I like going on- the anger fills the void of my life....
When I'm not actively doing something enjoyable to me, I'm passively getting angry at life.
I hope that makes sense. I needed to blog this.
Perhaps I'll try to elucidate on Tuesday( next day off) but I got home about about 12:45 and after checking mail wanted to blog this before going to bed.
Not sure if caffinee/ suger high is wearing off. I've drank more suger today then I prolly have the last two months( I'd say longer but I also had a soda last week due to working until midnight LAST saturday). I have 2 20oz. bottles of Dr.Pepper( though one was berries and creams), a bag of fritos with lunch and a HOT CHOCOLATE. I feel a need to mention the HOT CHOCOLATE because today was about 70 degrees in Boston... and I had a strong URGE for HOT CHOCOLATE which none of my co-workers understood.
Will prolly respond to aimee getting Obsidian tomorrow after work but wanted to write the above regardless of coherence before I crashed....
Later Days.
Which made me wonder about cause and effect. Was the anger pushing out all the good stuff, or because there was no good stuff the anger was filling the void.
I decided that it was the second because of the lack of good- the anger filled the void. I say this because when I watch say Scrubs, or play a video game, or do something else I LIKE- the anger is displaced by my enjoyment... I forget that I'm angry because I'm NOT ANGRY when I'm doing something I like. Therefor, when I don't have something I like going on- the anger fills the void of my life....
When I'm not actively doing something enjoyable to me, I'm passively getting angry at life.
I hope that makes sense. I needed to blog this.
Perhaps I'll try to elucidate on Tuesday( next day off) but I got home about about 12:45 and after checking mail wanted to blog this before going to bed.
Not sure if caffinee/ suger high is wearing off. I've drank more suger today then I prolly have the last two months( I'd say longer but I also had a soda last week due to working until midnight LAST saturday). I have 2 20oz. bottles of Dr.Pepper( though one was berries and creams), a bag of fritos with lunch and a HOT CHOCOLATE. I feel a need to mention the HOT CHOCOLATE because today was about 70 degrees in Boston... and I had a strong URGE for HOT CHOCOLATE which none of my co-workers understood.
Will prolly respond to aimee getting Obsidian tomorrow after work but wanted to write the above regardless of coherence before I crashed....
Later Days.
3 Comments:
At 1/08/2007 04:21:00 PM,
Anonymous said…
I'm pretty much full of nothing right now too, Drew.
Sucks, sucks, sucks.
Sigh.
At 1/09/2007 04:32:00 PM,
Drew said…
Yes it does.
Sorry to read that aimee. Hope that you can find something to fill you up...
*smirk* and by that I mean something that might fill you in an emotional way... though if you want to be filled up the OTHER way, that's fine too. Not sure which would make YOU *wink* happier.
Sorry mind's in the gutter now. Really mean you well wishes.
At 1/10/2007 01:26:00 PM,
Anonymous said…
Naughty, naughty, naughty...
Heh.
Come to think of it, there is this one person...
LOL.
This made me giggle! Thanks, Drew!
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