Toxic Love

The ‘support’ from my mom about my new job has come in two toxic forms.
The first was her asking me if I’ll still be able to get to the gym enough with the new job. One of my best friends (who has actually met all three of my father’s wives) feels that this goes to the fact that my mom will indeed love ME less if I’m fat. I put the emphases on ME because even at my fattest- I think she gave ME more crap then she gave her husband about HIS weight( he's been out of shape for a while having 'let himself go' in his old age). Heck, right now I’m in better shape then my older brother- and I don’t think I’ve heard a negative word from her about him which goes to the fact that HE is her favorite… Because as I see it she should get on him even more as he needs to be in good health to bring up his daughter and two step daughters.
And as I type the last part- I got a wicked smile on my face- due to sexist double standards. See my older brother just proposed and I don’t think word ONE has been mentioned that he might want to lose weight so he ‘looks good for his big day.’

The second toxic love was a phone call today where she said she “hoped [I] made the right choice” about the new job. I was like WTF? Bite your tongue to suggest that I’m making the wrong choice. I explained that I’ll be making more $ at the new job and that I’m getting out of the gift store on my own steam. I tried to explain to her that Kenny has been writing people up left and right and one of my EX assistant managers a few months ago (before she left) actually advised me to take a pay CUT to get out of the gift store as the ex- assitant manager felt that I had no protection in the manager from Kenny and that Kenny was out to get me…. It just really bothered me NOT that my mom has no faith in me, but that she would VOICE her lack of faith TO ME… Like she’s hoping I fail or something. Nevermind that I told her I’m getting a raise and FULL health care- she’s worried that since it’s a NEW company they might fail and then where would I be. I pointed out to her that I feel that them being NEW means that there’s room for me to GROW.
I just feel she should’ve kept her yap shut as I’m starting a new job and want POSTIVIE thoughts not her ‘worrys’ no matter how ‘reasonable’ she thinks they are.